nostalgia

this is a short piece I wrote for the ADHS website in 2005 regarding events of December 2003. the non-profit I was working for at the time was contracted by the Roman Catholic Diocese of Phoenix to give "Safe Environment" and sexual assault / abuse prevention workshops to all Catholic schools in the area. given that the POWER program was delivered to 7th through 12th graders, the junior high and elementary schools would often invite parents to an "information session" about a week before we would present to each school. through some fluke of scheduling, I was sent to this parent night pretty much by myself before I had ever delivered or even seen the entire program. (the other presenter mentioned is not Tom, but someone who presented another program and couldn't help answer any questions about mine.)

This "baptism by fire" will be funny in hindsight, I tell myself.

I barely stifle a smirk. I doubt that the men and women glaring at me would share my amusement. Surprisingly enough, even the nicest of people completely lose their sense of humor when perceiving a threat to their children. There is a moment of silence as I look down at the wilting piece of notebook paper my mentor had scrawled a very rough outline on. The answer isn't there, but even if it was, I wouldn't realize it because in this magical moment, I manage to forget what was asked of me.

Welcome to my first parent night ever.

for speaking at a conference, I received a gift bag that included a matching "padfolio" and lunch cooler. I felt my bpa-free stainless steel adult thermos filled with red kool-aid would go well with my adult trapper keeper* and my adult lunch box. despite having all this neat stuff, however, I'm still not (yet) invited to eat at the cool kids' table in the cafeteria. perhaps I should find an adult equivalent to the slap bracelet.

*as if I needed further verification that I'm getting old, I asked a student worker if she knew what a trapper keeper was and she said, "isn't it just a folder?" is it possible to explain how many nascent nerds felt that their entire social status hinged on acquiring one of these "just a folders?"

Wir müssen durch viel Trübsal in das Reich Gottes eingehen.
We must enter the Kingdom of God through much sorrow.
(Acts 14:22)

about twelve years ago, I attended a fairly rigorous music camp. by rigorous, I mean that every student had a three hour mandatory practice session scheduled every day. in addition to that, there were other blocks of optional practice time which *limited* students to a total of 7-8 hours a day. at the end of the optional evening practice times, the camp counselors would have to go door to door to remove students from the practice rooms 1/ for legal supervision reasons but primarily 2/ to keep the students from practicing so much that they injured themselves.

"fairly" rigorous.